Monday, November 26, 2012

Update...

I thought a little update was in order since my last post was in April. Good grief!  Over the summer I did not pursue any agents because I was working on the changes I made on my first book, A Rescued Heart.  I LOVE the new changes and the added depth it brings to the storyline and the characters.  I also began working on my second book in the series, Come to my Rescue, and I am almost half-way done...and super excited about it!  In October I began sending out butt-loads of query letters to agents.  I have had many-many rejections, enough to last me a lifetime it feels like, but I'm not giving up and I'm not too upset yet.  I knew entering into this journey my chances of getting published were slim to none, so I feel until God reveals to me I need to stop pursuing this dream, I'm gonna keep going full force.  I'm entering contests to get my name and manuscript out there.  I've entered a First Impressions contest that is the first five pages of my manuscript.  I've entered the East Valley Authors Query Contest which consisted of a synopsis and query letter.  And in the next month I will enter my manuscript in Romance Writers of America's Golden Heart  contest and in January I will enter it into ACFW's Genesis contest.  That is unless I get published first.  I do have some exciting news...and trying REALLY hard not to get too excited or get my hopes up.  There is a small christian publishing company reading my manuscript now.  My heart is thumping like crazy with anticipation that my dream may come true...and nervous of being rejected again.  So until I hear from them, I pray, keep writing, and pray more!
I am in a mom's group called MOTTTS, that is so encouraging to me and gives me that extra pep in my step during the week and I always walk out encouraged and pumped to be the best mom and wife I can be.  I write a weekly devotional for the group, and God placed this experience I am going through on my heart to share with others that might be in a place in their life like me.  Searching for answers, wanting God's will - but not sure what it is or looks like at this point.  So I thought I'd share...

“I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth.  These are the things I will do; I will not forsake them.”

                           -Isaiah 42:16

I love this verse for the many times in my life where I am not sure where to go or which way to turn.  When I am at the T in the road of life.  I am in this unknown place right now with my desire to be a published author.  I know my desires- my wants, but I am not sure where God is calling me.  I obviously want His will to be done, because without Him my desire would be pointless.  Does He want me to be published?  Maybe not because He knows I couldn’t handle the pressure of deadlines or the attention (good and bad) it would bring.  Maybe the answer is yes, but wait.  Have you ever been at a place like this in your life?  When you are not sure where God is calling you?  It can be a very frustrating time.  I challenge you to pursue God and ask for His desires for your life.  That He would be your eyes, your hands, and your feet as you tread through this unknown time.  That He would reveal His plans for you.  That He would turn the darkness into light before you as He reveals which direction you should go.  That your desires would become in tune with His.  How does this happen? By spending time with Him, digging into the Word and taking the time to be still so that you can listen for His leading.  Isaiah 30:21 says, “Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.”  Most importantly you must have faith.  If you go into this time not confident that He will lead you, the waters will be muddy and you will be easily distracted or unable to identify His direction.  So stand firm on His promise that He will NOT forsake you and in His perfect timing reveal His good- and perfect will.

Heavenly Father, with you is where I want to be.  I desire your Spirit, your presence, and your divine calling for my life.  Help me to keep my mind and heart clean so that I am better able to hear your voice.  Amen.